Apa lagi yang aku mahu?

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Bismillah. Assalamualaikum wbt.

Aku curi masa sikit update blog. Sebab sayang kalau apa yang terlintas dalam fikiran aku beberapa hari ini tidak aku catat di sini. For at least, it will remind me that I ever had this thought in my mind.


Apa yang aku mahu lagi?

Alhamdulillah, seusia 25 tahun aku sudah bekerja dan mempunyai gaji sendiri. I'm beyond happy because I know my family is happy for me too. That's my ultimate and my priority in life, to make my family proud of me especially Mama.

Mama can menghembus nafas lega sebab anak perempuannya yang terakhir ini sudah mampu menampung keperluan hidupnya sendiri. Malah mendapat lebih untuk kehidupan yang selesa. Alhamdulillah. Semua  ini atas pertolongan Tuhan, Sedikit pun aku tidak layak untuk mengatakan ini atas usaha diri sendiri. Tuhan yang Maha Kuasa membenarkan semua ini. Bersyukurnya ya Allah. Terima kasih :')


Apa yang aku mahu lagi?

Jodoh?. Tipulah kalau aku tidak rasa "triggered" bila dapat tahu ramai kawan-kawan yang sudah mendirikan rumah tangga. I'm 25 already, boyfriend pun tiada haha. Tapi, mengenangkan lifestyle aku yang sangat masih tidak mahu memberi komitmen dalam sebarang perhubungan dan tanggungjawab serupa itu serta  menyedari akan kanak-kanaknya lagi jiwa aku ini, it's fine. Kahwin is not that what I really want. Seriously. It doesn't matter, jodoh yang sedang tersesat tu sampai, nanti aku kahwin lah haha.

Lagi pun, I'm enjoying my life literally to the fullest. I really know how to make myself happy. And that is enough. Sendiri pun tidak apa. Lintasan-lintasan mahu kahwin tu tenggelam timbul. Maksudnya, it's not that really matter yet. Hehe. Single is still awesome what?.


Jadi, aku mahu apa lagi?

Now I'll give the answer. What I really wanted then?.

This might sound cliche and eh tiber~ but seriously,

I want to have my beautiful ending. Husnul Khotimah. I want to die with iman, I want to end my life with loads of good deeds I made while I'm alive. Aku mahu keluarga aku dipermudahkan atas urusan pemergian aku dari dunia yang fana ini. Aku mahu diceritakan hal-hal yang baik sahaja selepas pemergian aku untuk kembali kepada Tuhan.

Aku mahu mati dalam keadaan mulia dan dilindungi aib-aibku.


Tiba-tiba. I know. 

But the more I'm living my life, the more I'm scared of how I will die.

Semoga kita semua diberi keindahan pengakhiran yang baik. Amiin Amiin ya Rabbal 'Alamin.


In shaa Allah, 'till next post :)


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